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Alias: N/A Age: 18 Sexuality: Bisexual Height: 160cm Weight: 48 kg Hair: Long ponytail, pink in color. Eyes: Catlike and purple. Skin and Scars: Pale skin and no visible scars.
Details
Normally wears a tunic and trousers along with the vanta armor that adorns his arms and feet. He has cat ears and a tail, but he hides them under a wool hat and his tail tucked inside his pants. His eyes are purple and very much catlike with his hair in the shape of a ponytail and pink in color. Despite being a male, he is very feminine in appearance and short which does not help the matter.
Personality
"It is just my job, nothing more nothing less"
Positives and Likes
✔ Realist ⤊ Fish ✔ Hard Working ⤊ Sweets ✔ Humble ⤊ Other afflicted ✔ Self-reliant ⤊ Sleep ✔ Sincere ⤊ Dreaming
Esmae is a very reserved person, not known to be very outgoing due to his lifestyle of hiding his status as an afflicted. This caused him to be very distant with his emotions, being almost indifferent to most of the events that happen around him.. However, that does not mean he has no emotion at all, he just has a very hard time showing it holding it in due to the situations that he has been in throughout his life. Despite all his downsides, he is hard-working and constantly trying to prove his worth to others knowing he is considered less but that only gives him more reason to try harder to prove his worth as someone that does not like to complain. However his hard-working personality causes him to be very stubborn and self-reliant, causing him to get in very troublesome situations that he could easily get over with the help of others or doing more work then he realistically has to. His trust of humans is also, indirectly, hindered due to his upbringing. He trusts his family indefinably, however the average human to him is less trustworthy as the average afflicted in his mind. Even those with good intentions.
History
Esmae was born on June 2nd in the Dubois family. He was a little premature, however, besides that everything else went smoothly. At a young age, Esmae was secluded from the outside world at the discovering of him being an afflicted; a taboo among the world that he lived in; he had the features of a cat .Esmae was home schooled, his whole life, never going to school like the other nobility children, due to him being an afflicted; which he did not mind terribly much. He was not ashamed of being an afflicted, but he was quick to grasp the concepts of the social expectation and discriminization of the afflicted to know that he had to hide it not just for his own safety but for his families as well.
However, their nice life in the seclusion of their home would not last forever, eventually they were caught when Esmae got sick and had to be taken to the doctor and a townsfolk made gossip about the emergence of the Dubois family having an afflicted child. Their rich family, not soon after the rumor started spreading, was soon to act in order to make snide attempts to acquire the Dubois family wealth. Slowly using means of taking away their family wealth, status and property and delving them into the very bottom of the social and economic ladder, using sly tactics of cutting of supplies and other such methods while justifying their seizing of their wealth as justification to them giving birth to Esmae.
He was only seven and he was on the street, eating scraps from the garbage that his parents could find and his mother had to do things that the gods would generally consider unfavorable just to manage to get a bill on the table. However, he knew little of this and his father never mentioned it either, to his blissful ignorance. He learned through this humility, as he had never had to miss a meal before but now he missed several. It was stressful for him at first, but with time he had gotten used to it and his body had adapted to survive. His father, doing mercenary work whenever he could for the cash; however it would take several months of this labor before they were able to have a relatively stable life. Eventually, after much struggle, the father managed to score a job as a hunter with the connections he had built over the course of his life as a mercenary.
Several years of his young life, he was trained henceforth to be a hunter by his father, in hopes that Esmae could live on the wealth that would be contributed as his career as a hunter; no longer having the family wealth that they did to guarantee esmae a happy life. The training was harsh, considering he had to wake up at early hours to work out and learn various weapons and hand to hand combat techniques. He did not like it, however, he knew that he had to and without quelm continued to do it every day to please his parents. However, his years in seclusion and distaste from the other humans made him more difficult and more of a loner then most; causing him to be a difficult person to train. After many years of training, he eventually became qualified to become a hunter and from then his story continues.
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ of THQ
★MEULK OF THQ
Last Edit: Feb 11, 2020 0:24:10 GMT by Esmae Dubois
Aetherreal is a gauntlet that have whips that can be shot out and reeled in. It is very minimalistic, only being as big as it needs to contain the whip inside it. The whip inside is only 7 meters long, made of vanta metal. It's inside is made of cloth, so it is more comfortable to wear.
Ability
Aethereal ability is to extend and to unextend up to no more then 7 meters. The whip that is concealed within the gauntlets to do things such as grappling onto objects in order to swing and works in conjunction of his preexisting mobility, strike the enemy using them as the aforementioned whips, wrapping them around enemies to detain, and use the armor portions to deflect very precise attacks if used actively to parry (as the armor is very small and only protects certain areas) amongst other applications of the vanta weapon.
Osteocompression
Rank 1 - Transforming
Power
Osteocompression gives the ability to transform the flexibility of the bones within the user's own body, giving them great levels of contortionism that would otherwise be impossible for even the most advance contortionist. This does not allow the bones within the body to stretch, as it does not become elastic, but only bend or squish to create rather strange angles and give the ability to squeeze through crevices that their head can fit through.
-Can bend/squish their bones to squeeze their way through things -Can bend/squish their bones to move their body in unnatural ways
Disadvantages
One would think that the bones would be more durable by becoming flexible, but it is quite the opposite, they become easier to slice through with a metal weapon and easier to break to all but blunt weapons; with blunt weapons not doing less damage just they don't have an extra damage bonus.
The brain, lung and heart is very fragile organs and as mentioned, the user can die if they accidently squish those organs, the user cannot and will never be able to flex their other body parts the same way they can their own bones.
The user can not use this technique for extended periods of time, wear and tear to the muscle tendons can happen and cause soreness and/or extreme pain after using unnatural angles for longer then a minute. This can, if used wrongly, can cause permanent damage to the body.
The user can be, when subjected to enough stress and pain, be unable to activate this ability. If this ability, was to for whatever reason, be deactivated while in the middle of bending their bones it will be stuck in that position till the power resets it or a doctor does. which can cause massive pain and lose the ability to use that particular part.
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ of THQ
★MEULK OF THQ
Last Edit: Feb 14, 2020 23:19:50 GMT by Esmae Dubois
Star Rank: 1 Description: They have the ability to move quickly and nimble around areas due to intense training they have endured in order to utilize their vanta weapons to the best of their abilities.
Military Ability Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Military Ability Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Military Ability Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Military Ability Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Military Ability Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Talents
Singing
Star Rank: 1 Description: Esmae has a beautiful voice for a guy, with keen control over his voice in terms of tonality, rhythm, and a variety of vocal techniques. They are very skilled in projecting a story through the melody, never off a beat.
Talent Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Talent Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Talent Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Talent Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Talent Name
Star Rank: Number. Description: "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nam imperdiet turpis ut urna imperdiet, et auctor dui pretium. Nulla vulputate urna non mollis sodales. Sed vel urna et lacus ultrices mattis ut non erat. Etiam neque sapien, vehicula et imperdiet non, sollicitudin sit amet justo. Donec scelerisque dapibus pretium. Suspendisse ultrices ipsum felis, et posuere elit faucibus id. Suspendisse consequat ullamcorper felis, lacinia dignissim enim posuere id. Aliquam vulputate sapien sed justo euismod lacinia. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Nulla tincidunt urna nec quam pulvinar aliquet. Sed sodales non est id tincidunt. Nam pellentesque quis quam in pretium. Maecenas libero sem, suscipit sit amet nisi non, pellentesque elementum nisi. Sed nunc odio, rhoncus lobortis sapien id, volutpat sollicitudin enim. Mauris diam lorem, bibendum ut quam at, ullamcorper accumsan nibh. Fusce facilisis quam dui, at consectetur magna hendrerit at."
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ of THQ
★MEULK OF THQ
Last Edit: Dec 28, 2019 2:07:03 GMT by Esmae Dubois
Hey, Esmae Dubois ! There are still some things that I'd like you to fix up regarding your Application before you are able to begin your adventure in Ordus! I'll list them below:
1) History
I'll quote some parts of what I want you to edit/fix up and some notes as to why below them:
"(...) noble military family it would tarnish their name and they feared at the worse case scenario, the removal of their noble rank; as many of the military nobility have been through excuses due to their obsolete functions."
You seem to be putting too much of an emphasis into the relation between families, nobility and the Vantalux Armed Forces/Government. Of course that there can be families that, historically and traditionally, have their members enroll in the Vantalux Armed Forces (not the Sponsored Jobs necessarily, see the thread on the Central Government of Vantalux in the Lore Encyclopedia). Despite this, the term "noble" doesn't really exist as an actal unique term in our World and, if anything, merely refers to the families that, for some reason or another, have a great amount of money and wealth. In a tl;dr fashion: if nobility is even a term, then it is just a synonym of "rich". Please take this into account in your History.
"when Esmae got sick and had to be taken to the village doctor and a villager made gossip about the emergence of the Dubois family having an afflicted child. Their nobility, not soon after the rumor started spreading, was soon taken away from consensus of the local lords."
There are no villages nor local lords. Stuck to the only cities in our Canon: Vantalux, The Wharf, Haven and Fumehat. These cities are administrated by one General each (with the exception of Vantalux, which administration is done by the Council of Five themselves), but they would have no reason to mess with the property and wealth of the Dubois' just because they had an Afflicted child. A solution for this would be you simply stating that, when other families discovered this, they cut down on the family sources of income and sabotaged their businesses to take advantage of the opportunity, leading Esmae and his parents to the state of poverty you later described.
"Eventually, after much struggle, the father managed to score a job as a hunter."
Take into account that, being a former Mercenary, this wouldn't be that simple for Esmae's father. Try to say that he did this transition to better provide for the family and that, to do so, he needed to cash in a bunch of favours he had gathered during his Mercenary time in order to "officially" change his identity and be accepted as a Hunter after he passed the trials.
"(...) he was trained henceforth to be a hunter by his father, in hopes that Esmae could live on the wealth that would be contributed as his career as a hunter (...)"
Being a Hunter doesn't necessary make you wealthy, especially at Esmae's Rank or at whatever Rank his father achieved. Be aware of this.
"After many years of training, he eventually became a decent hunter and from then his story continues."
This is also canonically wrong - if you are a Rank 1 Hunter, it necessarily implies you just officially joined the rankings recentely and, therefore, are a Rookie when it comes to this Sponsored Job. A fix to this is easy: just say that Esmae's father trained him on the side so he could, at least, be physically ready to apply and join the Hunter Job.
2) Vanta Weapon
First of all, I'd like to understand if the gauntlets are only in his hands (and if they cover merely the hands, working more like metal gloves, which I think is preferable due to what I'll write on my second point) or in his hands and knees. I'm asking because it needs to be just one pair, making your Vanta Weapon a "Gauntlets" and its Gimmick "Double Whip". Remember - you are just at Rank 1 and it's "Vanta Weapon", not "Vanta Weapons".
Second, are both Gauntlets and Whip made out of Vanta? Or is it just the Whips? I'd rather it be just the Whips and have the Gauntlets be regular Metal, because you have to take into account that the Gauntlets cannot be "armor" (even if "very small"), since that would, in essence, make your Vanta Weapon do way too much (since if both Gauntlets and Whip are made of Vanta that's, well, too much Vanta). Of course you could use them, in key moments, as a last minute defense, but they wouldn't be that effective in doing this all the time... especially if Esmae is being attacked by a higher ranked attack. This all because you need to take into account that it could imply that his hands are effectively immune to damage since they'd have appropriate durability of a vanta weapon which... does bring up a slew of issues with it."
Lastly, the Weapon's Gimmick (the Whips) don't give any kind of inherent "boost in mobility". If you want this, such would be linked to a Military Ability, in this case this Military Ability needing to be "Agility". You already have this Military Ability, so this works fine. Just warning about the use of this language!
3) Vel
The Vel is fine! Since she has a Cat Affliction, try to connect this with the Vel! For example, you could hint that her Vel his connected to her being Afflicted, since cat's are also known to be able to slip through tight spaces - Esmae's Vel potentializes it! On this account, also use her Vel in-RP inside the common sense of the Rank: you know, don't go around making Esmae being able to fit into mouse holes or stuff like that!!
--
That's all! If you have anything to say/ask, just DM me on Discord ^^
Hello Esmae. My name's Arkwright and I'm here for the second round of your grading.
From what I can see most of the things brought up previously have been addressed, however I'd like to see a couple more adjustments being made in roughly the same areas to ensure that the things Narlivion has brought up are in order.
First, for the history, as I see it most of the issues have been fixed, however there is one particular phrase that seems to be a leftover from the previous version of the history, namely: "he had the features of a cat and as a obsolete low class noble military family it would tarnish their name and they feared at the worse case scenario, the removal of their noble rank; as many of the military nobility have been through excuses due to their obsolete functions.", so please remove or modify this part accordingly.
The second bit I want to see clarified a bit is in regards to your weapon, specifically in regards to the mention of mobility you have, clarify that rather than boosting mobility, the whip works in conjunction with his existing mobility. Something along the lines of "using the whip to make the most of his mobility/agility" would be fine. Secondly, in regards to the armor portion, try rewording it away from the word armor. What I suggest you do is refer to it as a gauntlet simply and state "The gauntlet can be used to deflect or parry attacks, however it cannot passively act as armor without Esmae actively utilizing it for defense".
Since the changes are fairly minor, once you've made them feel free to DM me directly rather than positing in the submission thread and I'll take care of the approval.
